British "blitz" Spirit? Not much!

So - we've had a week to get used to things, accept our lot, and start looking to the future. In fairness a lot of folk are doing just that, but there is still, and has been throughout, an extraordinary amount of weeping, wailing and gnashing of teeth from both sides. Now I'll stress from the start, this is NOT a political post - I've never done politics on Social Media and I have no intention of starting now.  What it is though, is a comment on some of the frustrating, upsetting and just plain inaccurate things I've heard and seen over the past week.

The most alarming thing, possibly, is the people who are saying "But we were misinformed, we were fed lies" - you know what, and I hate to break it to you, but in ANY campaign of this type, both sides of the argument will twist the truth, embroider the facts, and tell you what they think you want to hear. Of course the "£350million per week to the NHS" claim on the Leave side is well documented now - but it wasn't just them who were - let's be charitable here - stretching the truth. One of the more dangerous lies I saw was on an extremely official looking leaflet from the Remain camp - so official looking in fact that at first, I thought it was the "impartial advice" that was being sent out. On the reverse of the leaflet it said (not exact wording) "If you're unsure which way to vote, then the safe option is to vote Remain as another vote can be held in the future". I do find myself wondering how many people took that "advice" to heart in spite of the fact that it is categorically false? The bottom line is that all the information was out there and easily accessible. (For the purposes of this I'm assuming that you are computer-literate and have access to the internet). I found enough information out there from various sources to make an informed decision - so what was your excuse for not doing so? If you expect all the information on something this important to be spoon-fed to you then I think the bigger question is actually whether you're responsible enough to be given a vote in the first place!

Next up - "Oh but it's alright - this referendum isn't legally binding" - well if you'd bothered to do any sort of research at all, or even taken the trouble to ascertain what you were being asked to vote in, you'd know that referenda are essentially an advisory instrument - designed to gauge the feelings of the country's voters on a particular issue. Had you done that research, you might also have understood why that lie I've mentioned from the Remain campaign above is so critical - in a referendum, if you are unsure which way to vote, you'd be very well advised to NOT VOTE AT ALL. Too many people failed to understand that a) this was a seriously important question and b) yes - regardless of the result it is possible that a further vote will be held on the subject in the future - but that "future" is likely to be a VERY long way away - decades not years. For a lot of us voting this time round, the "further vote in the future" is simply not likely to be in OUR future.

That brings us on nicely to those who didn't vote at all. If you couldn't make up your mind, and so were unable to put an informed X in a box, and you chose not to vote as a result - well done you. Please don't be browbeaten by those telling you that you should be ashamed, or that wonderful old chestnut "people died to so you have the right to vote" - the right to vote has a flipside, and that is the right to make an informed decision on NOT voting, also. That is democracy - that you have a choice. However, if you were one of those who couldn't be bothered to unwedge your backside from the sofa to go to the polling office - then stop your complaining right now - you have no right of reply on this issue. "I only remembered I needed to vote after the polling stations had closed" No - you're lying, Just shut up and stop digging. Likewise those who have said "I voted X but didn't realise it was so important and now wish I'd voted the other way" - really? The country has been talking about this question for YEARS, but the importance bypassed you? Again, we're back to the question of whether you are responsible enough to be given a vote, and possibly, in this case, whether you should ever be allowed to breed, also. (This also applies to those who voted based on factors other than whether they wanted the UK to stay in, or leave, the EU. A referendum is not a time for a protest vote, or a vote against a government, or a vote for the sake of it because you "had to vote for something" - again, had you researched, you would have understood that.)

A few other classics - "The turnout was too low for it to count" - the turnout was 72.2%. For reference, that was the highest turnout at the polling stations for a UK-wide vote since 1992. Do you want all the General Elections since then re-run as well? Shall we start with 1997? No, thought not. As a point of interest, less than 36% of voters in the UK turned out last time there were European Parliamentary Elections - and from 1979 - 2014 the highest turnout EVER was 38.52%, if that doesn't underline the apathy that the UK felt towards the EU, I don't know what does. If we accept that you do have a valid point on the question of turnout, the turnout in the 1975 EC (Common Market) referendum was even lower than this time round...SURE you still want to use that argument?
"There should be a 2nd referendum held" - why? The country was given the opportunity to a) Do our research b) make an informed decision and c) Get to a polling station and vote - on what basis should the vote be re-held? Because you couldn't be bothered? You do realise that this wasn't a playground game of "Rock/Paper/Scissors" - that when you lose, you can badger your mate to go "best of three"?
"All Leave voters are racists who only voted because they want to stop immigration" Nope. And if you're trying to soften it by saying "the majority of..." then nope again. Just 33% of Leave voters polled stated that "regaining control over immigration" was their primary reason. And you'll note - "control over" rather than "preventing".
"Leave voters didn't think it through" - well no again according to the polls - once you take out those who have "always known how they were going to vote" (39% of Remain voters and 36% of Leave voters - in other words those for whom no argument was going to sway their view) - the numbers suggest that actually, it was the remain voters who were more inclined to have made their minds up closer to the time - with 43% making their decision within a month of the vote. (41% for Leave voters)

I've heard so many people saying "I'm really angry" - and I can understand that anger, but NOT that it is being turned internally, turned against the country and its people. Fear too - frankly anyone who's jumping up and down with glee now and saying everything is going to be wonderful should be locked in a room with Nigel Farage and several very hungry Pit Bulls IMO. It's right to be wary of what's ahead - in fact it's helpful, a degree of fear helps to make sure people inform their choices  - maybe the vote would have been different if there had been less complacency on the Remain side - let's face it, the majority of us assumed it would be a vote to stay. (That's fact, not opinion - 7 in 10 voters expected a Remain win). Fear is a rational response - panic, however, isn't, and certainly isn't helpful in a situation like this. Martin Lewis of Money Saving Expert said on this subject "The most important thing we can do is keep calm, carry on and act Normal. If we can manage to do that collectively, the impact of this sentiment change will be minimal" and also quite rightly that it's perfectly possible to talk ourselves into a recession - really not what anyone wants, surely? (He's also put together an interesting "Brexit Q & A" which can be found HERE - well worth a read).

So, from now on, can we all start trying tio look forwards, not back. There's no place for hate, whether pointed at those of other nationalities, or at those who chose to place their X in a different box to that which we chose. Anger is great, it can be a very positive, driving emotion, but if it's directed at those who "misinformed" you, perhaps it's time to stop and think where the responsibility for that REALLY lies - in the information that "they" provided, or in your lack of challenge to that information?

Robyn

 

NOTE:  - I've thought hard about whether to disable comments on this one. At the moment I'm leaving them open, but some rules: Your comment does not descend into political ranting. Be polite and  above all constructive. No abusive language. Bear in mind that I've not said which way I've voted, and nor will I. You may disclose as you choose but please respect my decision and avoid speculating on what you "think" I chose - you stand a 50% chance of being wrong, in any event. ;-)  I'll be deleting comments that don't respect the above. 

We did it...

...finally, 13 years after moving into our flat, we took the plunge and got the bathroom sorted out. when I say "sorted out" - the builder who did the work asked on arrival exactly what we wanted done and the answer was "everything" - so everything it was - quite literally floor to ceiling and even most of the walls.

The issue we had with the bathroom from the start was that while it wasn't to our taste (far from it, in fact!) it was liveable-with. Once we'd got the previous occupants' years of neglect off the toilet, basin and bath that was. Even when the floor developed a hole, we learned to step over it and walk round it rather than be brave enough to actually commit to doing something about it. Over the years we've gradually put together ideas, thoughts and plans. That bathroom has been on our "to do" list for a VERY long while, and finally after a chat with a lovely friend a few months back (his take on it was "for goodness sake just DO IT - you'll talk about it forever!"), we took a deep breath and put the wheels in motion, getting the lovely Dave-The-Builder (he SO should have been called Bob!) to come and look, and quote, and then go ahead with the job.

The biggest issues with the old room (discounting the blue suite, and the hole in the floor already mentioned), were the size - the room is pretty much tiny, although still astonishingly bigger than the bathroom in our old place which just ludicrously small - and the lack of storage. There was a vanity unit under the sink but it was essentially one big cupboard, so it made finding anything in there extremely difficult and when you pulled one thing out, there was a tendency for domino-effect to kick in as lots of other things that you didn't want, followed the first. We stuck a set of wooden IKEA drawers on the window sill for odds and ends but that blocked a lot of light and didn't help much on the storage front, either. It also had a tendency to get terribly damp - the 1980's polystyrene ceiling tiles didn't help with that and were truly impossible to keep clean. Everything gradually turned black with mildew and as fast as you cleaned it off, more took hold. The double-glazed window had all its units blown - effectively meaning that it was no longer double-glazed, and the cistern on the loo was getting slower and slower to fill.

We decided from the start that if we were going to do it, we were going to do it right - no cutting corners to save costs, that while it might not be cheap it WOULD end up as we wanted it, and as it would best work for us. We discovered early on that there were ways of making savings too - for example the taps - we looked endlessly for the "right" thing, and finally found a set in one of the DIY warehouses for just under £200 for the pair - basin mixer and bath mixer - but looking online found an identical set from elsewhere for half the cost. The shower - again seen in real-life, but bought online saved us nearly £100. we could easily have spent three times as much on the plain white tiles for the majority of the walls, than we did - but you know, the 55p-a-tile ones looked every bit as nice, and the very first floor tiles that we actually liked enough to put on our floor turned out to cost us a grand total of £25.76 for the entire floor! Those savings in turn meant that when we DID need to spend a bit extra, we did it without flinching. These...

...for example - our gorgeous mosaic tiles. £135's worth  of gorgeous mosaic tiles, to be exact - BUT they were exactly what we wanted, and they look stunning! (they look even better now they're grouted in, too!) Size limitations meant that we were struggling to fit in anything more than a 2-door vanity originally, but I knew for sure that a while ago I'd seen one that had the layout we wanted AND fitted the gap, so I dug around on the internet until I turned it up.

Dave-The-Builder too had some great ideas to offer - it was his suggestion to paint the top half of the biggest wall in a very soft pale grey, for example, and also to continue the splashback of mosaic right across behind the loo, not just behind the sink. He also built the superb recess above the bath, meaning that shampoo bottles etc no longer need to sit on the edge of the bath getting in everyone's way and occasionally falling over and landing painfully on your toes...

This is the first serious job we've had done on the flat - and we've learned a lot from it - that a really good craftsman is worth his weight in gold, for example, Dave came to us as a recommendation and he's been brilliant. We ended up with the job going ahead quicker than we'd expected though - and that has caused some issues - basically I spent every spare second in the first week running round sourcing things, googling stuff and trying to get everything organised so it would be ready when needed. That when you live in a flat, having a garage which can be used for storage is a godsend - lord knows what we'd have done without that. That Topps Tiles online ordering system with "collection from store" means you have to wait longer for your tiles than had you opted for their free delivery to home. (Yes, that one caused a delay). That actually checking that that the Charcoal Grey rubbish bin you've ordered from the store IS Charcoal Grey, and not realising three hours after you get it home that, in fact, it's purple, saves a lot of time later. (No, it wasn't in a box, I was just so frazzled that I didn't even think about it. Credit to Dunelm Mill for superb customer service to sort that one out though!). Above all we've learned that attention to detail, and trusting your instincts, go a long way - the thing we're most pleased about is that we planned the room out from scratch ourselves, and it's all come together looking exactly as we hoped it would.

Robyn

Social Mediocracy...

I've posted before on the subject of Social Media, and it's good and bad sides. I'm still in two minds - I love the fact that it's so easy to share photos with an ever-wider audience on the likes of Twitter & Flickr, for example. That Facebook lets me stay in contact with people who otherwise, I'd have no likelihood of staying in touch with, and whilst I may not have much to do with them, I wouldn't want to totally lose touch. Facebook is also great for keeping in touch with people who fall into certain "compartments" in my life - airshow people in the winter, Great British Beer Festival friends who live at the other end of the country from one August to the next. Instagram is ace for being able to just see little snippets of people's lives - some I know personally, others I don't, but I choose to keep my "follows" on there to a small group as mostly this means that I can keep up with my feed and don't miss too much. In part as a result of that I've been surprised how fast my number of followers has built up to be honest - but it's truly lovely that so many people like what I post on there.

One thing I really don't like about social media generally is the fact that it does seem to give a certain "type of person" an outlet to be snipey, bitchy or just plain cruel. The older I get, the more time moves on, the more I find online one-upmanship or spiteful behaviour to be completely unacceptable. If you're someone who regularly gets a kick out of making nasty little jibes at people, or patronising them, then get over yourself please - you are absolutely NO better than anyone else and the only person you will make look small, ultimately, will be yourself.  As someone who has been using assorted online forums for a good many years, it's a sad fact that there have always been "keyboard warriors" - the sort of folk who like nothing better than sitting hunched over their computer firing nasty little jibes at those who they think are a) the most likely to be affected and b) are least likely to retaliate. Just like any other playground bully out there, they won't generally attack anyone who they think is likely to challenge their behaviour, and if in an environment where others are likely to see their comments, they generally take care to ensure that, if challenged by someone else, they can claim not to have meant what is being suggested, that they are being taken out of context...

Generally speaking whether online or in real life I do have an issue with people being two-faced. I'm always doubtful about trusting, for example, someone who is sweet as pie to someone's face, yet will happily slag them off to me, behind their back. Not nice, and it doesn't take much thinking to realise that person would almost certainly be doing the same in reverse! Happy to maintain an aquaintance of sorts with someone like that, but they are definitely never going to be someone who I will trust with my innermost secrets! Again, it sort of feels as though Social Media does facilitate this sort of behaviour too. A friend on FB has regularly had problem with someone on their friends list who is clearly acting as a go-between - passing information about him back to somebody who has been responsible for some fairly nasty online bullying of my friend in the past - and this too is having a huge impact on him as he simply doesn't know who to trust anymore. Considering that my friend has a history (which he freely and publicly acknowledges) of severe depression - that's a pretty low way to behave, and watching him crumble when yet another incident of this behaviour rears it's head is so sad. He's got the person who was the original problem blocked on every possible level, as has his partner, yet still the information leaks back, and he's simply run out of ideas to stop it.

I regularly see cute little pictures being posted on Twitter, or lines in people's online biographies spouting legends about "being nice" - yet oddly enough so often, the sort of people who use that sort of thing are just the people who, when you watch their behaviour for a while, are about as far from "nice" as can be imagined! I often wonder if they replicate their online behaviour in real life - perhaps they are the people who will happily drive right down a closed motorway lane until they are practically on top of the incident it is closed for before confidently barging into a gap in the traffic that never really existed. Can they be found on trains sitting in someone else's reserved seat? Or maybe picking up every apple in the box in Tesco before selecting one perfect enough for them - carelessly throwing those they discard back into the heap to bruise them for everyone else? Are they those with a huge sense of entitlement and superiority complex who stalk around sneering at those they see as unworthy of or too lowly for their attention, and being rude to shop assistants just for fun? the one thing I am sure that all these people have in common is that actually, I suspect their lives aren't anywhere close to as happy as they try to pretend - nobody who is genuinely comfortable in their own skin, happy with their life and secure in their friendships has a need to act like this, do they, so perhaps these unpleasant characters we've all had the misfortune to run across, we should actually be feeling sorry for? I'll let you make your own mind up on that one, but you'll find me making every effort to avoid them, as I have been, thank you!

(Happy) New Year...

I'm not great with New Year. I tend to find the level of jollity expected quite hard to cope with - for me it tends to be a time to reflect back on the year gone and sometimes - 2015 was no exception - that can be quite sad. A very good friend lost to the dreaded Cancer - still slightly unbelievable that we'll never see her again, never stand on the steps at Foxhall Stadium cheering on the Witches together...our little Gang of Four has become a gang of three with her loss. My parents also said farewell to the older of their two dogs - although she'd reached a good age and definitely had a wonderful life throughout her time with them. Sad to see four-legged family members leave us though - especially ones you had a hand in the selection of during a trip to Battersea Dogs Home.  On a brighter note a friendship that I thought had to be let go has found a way through against the odds. Also something I'm still finding rather unbelievable - and yet which makes me smile every time I think about it. It's a friendship I value tremendously - and one which has taught me a lot, and I'm relieved beyond measure that we've found away to make it work. 

Lots of "pinch me" moments again in the last 12 months - mostly related to those Little Red Jets. Having photos used officially by the team was astonishing - and nothing I would have ever expected. Amazing to be given such incredible opportunities - and something that I never fail to be grateful for. So much fun around the airshows with the usual suspects - Claire, Kate, Tom & Anthony -- and we're planning more of the same for 2016. 

Elsewhere MrEH and I have made further progress towards killing off the mortgage over the past 12 months - and that attack will continue, albeit we are now very much on the home stretch. We've got plans also to start on some much-needed work on the flat - with a new bathroom being top of that list. We've also got plans for more UK travels including visiting a couple of new-to-us Hebridean islands, as well as our now regular trip to Uist. 

As usual I won't be making any New Year's resolutions, as such - I really don't believe in them. Aims for the year are really to enjoy life, to learn to accept things more readily, to accept in particular that sometimes friendships aren't "because of" anything, they just are. To accept that decisions made are usually for the best in the long term, but that doesn't mean that it's not entirely natural from time to time to reflect back and question whether a particular choice was the right one. To recognise the signs of the Black Dog approaching and to deal with them before it takes hold. To be happy. 

Robyn 

All quiet... (In every sense!)

A few days ago I had a good natter with my lovely pal from The Wind & The Wellies about struggling to find ones voice when it comes to writing stuff online, and the reasons for that. In fact she's very sensibly written a whole blog post on the subject already. She talks much sense. Go. Read.

Done? Good - I'll carry on then! Well, I say I'll carry on, but that's not entirely straightforward it is it - because as I said to her earlier, I'm just not sure what to write about...and that makes it just a little bit tricky. It's been a funny sort of year - the summer was once again massively busy and full of all sorts of fun, but in the background there was been some stresses (which I mentioned here previously) which have only finally sorted themselves out quite recently. In the process of it I thought I was going to end up losing contact with a very dear friend - not through either of our fault, or even really choice, but simply because that was going to be the best thing for both of us. In the end - thank goodness - we found a way through, and in fact have probably emerged with a stronger friendship because of it. It's made me realise quite how much I valued the whole relationship though, and maybe that's no bad thing, to have that sort of reminder from time to time? All in all though the process of dealing with the situation has taken up a hell of a lot of my headspace over the last little while, and not left that much time for writing stuff on here.

There is the added issue of, since the airshow season finished, I've not really done a huge amount to talk about. There have been odds and ends - a couple of beer festivals, a trip to Birmingham for the Good Food show (think lots of cheese, and nearly as much smoked fish...) and a couple of trips up to Scampton to see the Reds winter training. All good fun, but not really anything that's made me think "I must tell the Blog about that". Thankfully though there is plenty of plans for the New Year - a trip to Manchester, a weekend in Norfolk, some more Island adventuring, and indeed some Ireland adventuring too, more pointing the camera at Little Red Jets (as I do) and a few other odds and ends to be crammed in there too. Then before I know it the airshows will be starting again - we're already starting to plan where we're heading next year although for me nothing will be set in stone until we see the Reds display calendar for the year - I will then plan my summer around that.

Other than that - life continues much as normal. Whilst living less frugally than we were this time a year ago - that is as the result of a conscious choice, that sometimes there are things that are worth spending money on as they save us valuable time, or give us enough enjoyment that they are worth it. The renting of the garage for example, gives us back space at home, and will help my car to stay in good condition for longer. MrEH is looking at a shirt laundering & pressing service as a possibility at the moment too - ironing is nobody's favourite pastime is it, and over time it's impossible to keep white shirts looking as crisp and fresh as they ought to with home laundering, so while he probably wouldn't use that sort of service on a weekly basis, he may do occasionally just to give his work wear a freshen up. Other stuff doesn't change at all - I still pretty much entirely cook from scratch as that's the food we prefer - ready meals (unless they're home cooked and frozen ones!) don't suit us. We shop around for the best deals on things, buy train tickets for planned adventures when they are first released for the best prices, meal plan and budget for stuff.  All good, all ticking along. We're still not sure exactly what and when our final target is, but at the moment, as things stand, that is also just fine. I'm tentatively planning a "use it up" month for January - aiming to tackle to store cupboard, larder, freezer and fridge - so some inventive meals may be beckoning! Whether that becomes a Frugal Friday theme I've not decided yet, but you never know.

Life is good - and you can't ask for much more than that, can you!

Robyn

Frugal Friday...

Ooh it's been a while since I've written a "Frugal Food" post! I enjoyed this recipe so much though, and it is just SO frugal, I felt I should share...

Spawned less from frugality and more from an evening when we had forgotten to get anything out of the freezer to cook, winter was starting to make it's presence felt by way of squally rain and a cold wind, and we were both absolutely STARVING. A hasty rustle through the the cupboards and fridge for what we had in lead to this lovely warming, filling dish.

Finely slice an onion and saute off in a pan in oil with a little knob of butter added. A pinch of salt over the onions at the start helps with the cooking and the combination of that and the butter gives the onion a lovely golden colour too. Add a pinch of chilli flakes - mine were some gorgeous smoked ones bought recently at the Ludlow Food Festival. If you don't have flakes then powder is fine, or even tabasco - just bear in mind you want a gentle warmth rather than a fierce heat, though. Slice a fresh pepper - any colour will do, or you could use a handful of sliced frozen ones. (A really useful ingredient to keep in the freezer at around £1 a bag). Once everything is soft and the onions are turning golden tip in either a carton of passata or a tin of chopped tomatoes, and stir well. Add a half-teaspoon of sugar to counteract the acidity of the tomato.

Once everything is simmering together gently it's time to get a large pan of well salted water on the go - bring to a good boil and tip in your pasta or spaghetti - pop a lid on but for goodness sake don't forget about it - overcooked pasta is vile! Open a tin of sardines - if in sauce throw the lot into the pan with the tomato mixture, if in oil hoike the sardines out and chuck those in and reserve the oil. Add a teaspoon of smoked paprika and, if you want to bulk the dish out a bit, a can of well drained butter beans and stir *VERY* gently - you want to ensure everything heats through but not break the sardines up too much.

Once your pasta is cooked drain it roughly and if you have reserved oil from the sardines throw it back into the pan with the oil and toss together. My final touch for the sauce was to check the seasoning and then add some coriander leaf - I buy fresh coriander by the bunch and pop it into the freezer so I can just shake out a little at a time. Serve the sauce spooned over the pasta.

Rough costings for this:
Spaghetti (8p) Pepper (15p if using frozen) Onion (7p) Herbs & Spices (5p max) Sardines (40p) Tomatoes (33p) Butter Beans (33p) = Total cost £1.41 or £1.08 if omitting the beans - with them however this made two REALLY generous portions - to be honest it would have fed three easily just with the addition of a little more pasta.

This one will definitely be getting added into the repertoire regularly - tasty, cheap and most importantly sometimes QUICK.

On friendship...

Friends...we all have them - at least, I hope you're not reading this and thinking "Well I don't....*sniff*" They come in different shapes and sizes - there are best friends, good friends, casual acquaintances, social media "friends", workmates. Every now and again though you might meet someone who for whatever reason you have an immediate connection. The kind of friendship that others will look at and say "So how on earth are you two friends then?!" in astonishment, and the only answer you can come up with is a sort of helpless shrug and "We just are!" Sometimes this sort of friend is someone who you can not speak to for ages, but when you do the pair of you just pick up where you left off, in other cases it might be someone with whom you keep a regular dialogue going, but either way that connection means that the friendship endures regardless.

Over the past few years I've been lucky enough to make several of these friends - each are very different in their own way. One I got to know through an online forum, and pretty much from the very first moment we interacted at all we just utterly "got" each other. Since then we've seen each other through tragedy and triumph, shared confidences that in some cases we haven't even told our respective partners about, and know without a question of a doubt that we can absolutely, 100% categorically trust the other with that sort of information.  We're incredibly similar in a lot of ways although from totally different backgrounds and our lives have taken very different paths. Another I met through a shared interest - I was aware of them through social media although we hadn't interacted at all on there, and on realising who I was standing just along from I bounced up and introduced myself in my usual impetuous way when I know full well if I stop to think too long I'll chicken out! In return I got a deeply suspicious look that I now know to be a fairly standard one for that sort of introduction, but somehow regardless of that a friendship was born, one which others now assume has been very long, when in fact we've only known each other a couple of years! A third I worked with for years - well I say "with" - for the same company but some 120 miles apart! Work calls to check stock levels rapidly extended into long chats that got the pair of us ticked off at various times by assorted Managers and now although both of us have long since escaped from the company concerned we're still in very regular touch and very close friends. Then there's the friend who messaged me on social media after seeing some of my pictures - casual chat lead to meeting up, and I suspect to an extent to both of our surprise we got on like a house on fire immediately. Polar opposites in a lot of ways, with seemingly relatively few shared interests, that's never lead to a lack of conversation or us being any less than comfortable together and if something exciting happens in my life they are unquestionably one of the very first people I want to tell! I rarely meet anyone who I trust almost immediately, but in this case I definitely did. This is definitely one friendship that's had a lot of others scratching their heads! Finally another "Social Media Friend" who has now become one of my very best - from initially casual interaction on Twitter we realised we were going to get on well, and in fact the very first time we met at all it was actually to spend several days in each other's company! Since then we've been in almost daily contact, and shared secrets and excitements, tears and giggles and LOTS of booze!

Sometimes it's impossible to label friendships, to explain to others why you're friends with someone. Yes obviously a lot of friendships stem from a strong shared interest, but sometimes in life our interests change, we stray away from the environment that brought us into contact with particular people in the first place.  In some cases that means we also drift away from the people concerned, but even then the real friendships will continue as we've moved past those shared interests into discovering what else we like and identify with in a person. Yesterday I stood alongside several other friends at the funeral of another - we've all known each other for years, range in ages from 50's through to 20's (and in fact are  well spread across that age range) and don't necessarily see each other every week, month or even year, yet in spite of that yesterday, for a few hours, we were each others closest comfort. Each and every time we meet now there will be a great big gap where our other friend should be standing.

Appreciate your friends, treasure those strange connections with others, don't waste time asking yourself why someone wants to be your friend, just rejoice in the fact that they do.

Robyn